Tuesday Top 10: Worst Seattle Sporting Event Concessions

Continuing our rich tradition (two weeks in a row now) of the Tuesday Top 10 focusing on the lighter side of Seattle sports, today's topic is none other than those uh, tasty delicacies found at our favorite local sports venues.

Honestly, I could have made a top 10 worst concessions at Safeco Field alone. I think the theme here is the more vendors try to class up the food and bev at sporting events, the more they miserably fail. Keep it basic, hot, fried, salty and cheap, and you should be good to go.

That said, my top 10 worst Seattle sporting event concessions:

1. Dippin' Dots (Safeco Field): A terrible spin on ice cream. The freeze-dried pellets taste like a stale, freezer-burned version of the real thing. And let's face it, the best part about eating ice cream at a ballpark is the mini helmet they serve it in. Not with this stuff.

2. Anything at Husky Stadium: Well, just about anything. I'll say the Dixie's Porter Special (hot link with barbequed brisket ladled on top) is the one acceptable concession at the Dawg House. But at over $10 a pop, it hurts you in the wallet just as much as it hurts you on the way out. Aside from that, Husky Stadium has received more negative pub about lack of amenities than a 1-star motel on Aurora.

3. Ivar Dog (Safeco Field): A long, thin piece of fried cod in a hot dog bun with coleslaw on top should not be called a "dog." Stick to fish and chips, Ivar's.

4. Ichi Roll (Safeco Field): Raw fish does not belong in crowded ball parks in the middle of August. Period. I don't care how big of a sensation Ichiro is here, I don't care about his Japanese-American following at the Safe. You never saw people eating kim chee in the stands at Dodger Stadium when Chan Ho Park was on the bump during his heyday.

5. King Dog (Kingdome): Remember the original King Dog and its green hue? You could direct ground traffic at Sea-Tac with those things.

6. Racha Thai (Qwest Field): Kind of goes along with the sushi - Asian cuisine is not meant to be served at stadiums, a la catering service and chafing dishes. Save it for the real restaurant on lower Queen Anne.

7. Shishkoberries (Safeco Field): Not only do you look ridiculous ordering and consuming these, doing it sans significant other in attendance with you (in other words, a girlfriend/wife that made you buy one) is grounds for ejection. Look, chocolate-covered strawberries are acceptable once a year: On Valentine's Day in a dimly-lit, obscure restaurant, far far away from anyone who may recognize you eating them.

8. Jones Soda (Qwest Field): A pure cane Jones to the dome isn't bad once in a while, but for it to be my ONLY choice at Qwest Field when I'm simply looking to dump out half and mix it with the Jack Daniel's I smuggled in for an ultra-sweet, boozy concoction that will leave your head spinning by the third quarter is a bit much.

9. Garlic Fries (Safeco Field): I'm not saying garlic-infused french fries aren't delicious. They are. But it comes with a big price. Forget about getting laid if you consume these. The nasty guys have been game-killers since day one. High school dudes - You've been forewarned.

10. Personal Pizza (Key Arena): The one thing from the Sonics I'm glad made the move to Oklahoma City. Purchasing one required a down payment and financing; eating one required teeth made of titanium.